The Kingdom of Malta Comino Gozo is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Robert Abela with a fair hand, and remarkable for its rum-swilling pirates, sprawling nuclear power plants, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, hard-working, democratic, cheerful, devout population of 12.553 billion Malta Comino Gozoans hold their civil and political rights very dear, although the wealthy and those in business tend to be viewed with suspicion.

The large government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Valletta. The average income tax rate is 98.6%.

The frighteningly efficient Malta Comino Gozoan economy, worth a remarkable 3,010 trillion Florins a year, is quite specialized and led by the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Book Publishing, and Retail. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an amazing 239,784 Florins, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.1 times as much as the poorest.

The nation grinds to a halt on the anniversary of every marginally noteworthy event, children often explain to their parents that the Mega Ultimate Sword Fist was worth the thousand-Florin charge on their phone bill, citizens finish cleaning up after the annual National Treasure Hunt just in time for the next one, and hospitals are amongst the best-funded in the region. Crime is totally unknown. Malta Comino Gozo's national animal is the Sloth Bear, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Christianity.

Malta Comino Gozo is ranked 115,288^th in the world and 5,001^st in The North Pacific for Largest Gambling Industry, scoring 1,085.48 on the Kelly Criterion Productivity Index.