The Federation of Chechno-Kalimovski is a massive, socially progressive nation, ruled by Akhmat Magomadov with a fair hand, and renowned for its compulsory military service, frequent executions, and spontaneously combusting cars. The compassionate, hard-working, democratic, devout population of 4.056 billion Chechno-Kalimovskians live in a state of perpetual fear, as a complete breakdown of social order has led to the rise of order through biker gangs.

The large, corrupt, liberal, outspoken government prioritizes Industry, although Defense, Healthcare, and Education are also considered important. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Akhmatkala. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 72.1%.

The frighteningly efficient Chechno-Kalimovskian economy, worth 438 trillion Chechno-Kalimovskian Rubles a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Book Publishing, and Information Technology. Average income is an impressive 108,082 Chechno-Kalimovskian Rubles, with the richest citizens earning 6.6 times as much as the poorest.

Akhmat Magomadov can often be found attempting to coax random citizens' cats down from trees, politicians who misplace decimal points on expense reports are fired for gross incompetence, the Chechno-Kalimovski Enquirer offers weekly cash prizes for 'most blasphemous song, story, or cartoon', and Court TV ratings have skyrocketed now that executions are filmed on location. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Chechno-Kalimovski's national animal is the Borz, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Islam.

Chechno-Kalimovski is ranked 54,044^th in the world and 759^th in The North Pacific for Nudest, with 204.75 cheeks per square mile.