The KickAss Corrections Officers of SORT is a gargantuan, environmentally stunning nation, renowned for its multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, keen interest in outer space, and punitive income tax rates. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 15.673 billion SORTans are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The enormous, corrupt, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, although Law & Order, Healthcare, and Education are also considered important. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Florence. The average income tax rate is 94.3%.

The frighteningly efficient SORTan economy, worth a remarkable 1,717 trillion dollars a year, is highly specialized and mostly made up of the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 109,599 dollars, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Military minds worry that 'the blue screen of death' on brand new operating systems may be a literal description, wood-framed catapults are ready to launch diseased corpses into besieged cities, childish pranks are no laughing matter, and class clowns are frequently listed among the most dangerous criminals in the nation. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. SORT's national animal is the eagle, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies.

SORT is ranked 40,810^th in the world and 1,756^th in The North Pacific for Healthiest Citizens, with 6.47 bananas ingested per day.