The Kingdom of Bardopia is a colossal, efficient nation, ruled by King Bard the first of His name with a fair hand, and renowned for its compulsory vegetarianism, national health service, and restrictive gun laws. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 6.216 billion Bardopians are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The enormous, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Education, Healthcare, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Bardopolis. The average income tax rate is 96.4%.

The frighteningly efficient Bardopian economy, worth 914 trillion Bardollars a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is highly specialized, is mostly made up of the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Tourism and Book Publishing. Average income is an impressive 147,188 Bardollars, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Photographers can be found hiding behind the curtains in King Bard the first of His name's bedroom, modelling agencies send their clients to work in nursing homes, elementary school students are required to master Bach's Chaconne in D before graduation, and the nation has welcomed its expats back with open arms. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Bardopia's national animal is the Bear, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Bardism.

Bardopia is ranked 314,773^rd in the world and 5,903^rd in The North Pacific for Largest Furniture Restoration Industry, scoring -14.49 on the Spitz-Pollish Productivity Index.