The Holy Money of Stal Valley is a massive, efficient nation, ruled by Ultimate evil money leader XVII with an iron fist, and remarkable for its rum-swilling pirates, sprawling nuclear power plants, and cultivated feral children. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 3.966 billion Stal Vallains are rabid consumers, partly through choice and partly because the government tells them to and dissenters tend to vanish from their homes at night.

The minute, corrupt, pro-business government, or what there is of one, is primarily concerned with Industry, with Defense and Spirituality also on the agenda, while Environment and Education are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Money. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Stal Valleyian economy, worth a remarkable 1,130 trillion Monies a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Retail industry, with major contributions from Gambling, Soda Sales, and Arms Manufacturing. Average income is an amazing 285,133 Monies, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 2,331,959 per year while the poor average 7,471, a ratio of 312 to 1.

Cholera is seen as the holiest of diseases, a nickname of "Doctor Death" probably indicates a decorated war hero, the navy plans patrols according to how many pubs nearby ports have, and vacationing Stal Vallains expect to be treated as royalty. Crime, especially youth-related, is so common that it is unusual to encounter someone following the law, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Stal Valley's national animal is the Human, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Stal Valley is ranked 74,701^st in the world and 1,297^th in The North Pacific for Most Patriotic, with 22.18 flags saluted per person per day.