The Republic of Lointland is a colossal, genial nation, ruled by Stewart Griffin with an even hand, and notable for its museums and concert halls, absence of drug laws, and punitive income tax rates. The compassionate, democratic population of 5.899 billion Lointians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The large government juggles the competing demands of Healthcare, Education, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Verdanna. The average income tax rate is 63.1%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The powerhouse Lointian economy, worth 501 trillion Consortieors a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Trout Farming, Basket Weaving, and Book Publishing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 85,037 Consortieors, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Stewart Griffin has declared a weed sticking through a crack in the sidewalk to be the nation's newest green space, Stewart Griffin is generally seen as a know-it-all (Lointland has found 1 easter egg), saying "don't do anything that Stewart Griffin wouldn't do" doesn't exclude a great deal, and all new "spies" are fifteen-year-old acne-ridden kids on computers. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Lointland's national animal is the Loint Tigers, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Lointland is ranked 58,760^th in the world and 1,183^rd in The East Pacific for Lowest Crime Rates, with 72.05 law-abiding acts per hour.