The Colony of Tea Jol is a colossal, efficient nation, ruled by DJ Moyer with an even hand, and remarkable for its smutty television, complete lack of prisons, and stringent health and safety legislation. The hard-nosed, hard-working population of 5.935 billion Tea Jolians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The medium-sized government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Galapagos. The average income tax rate is 83.8%.

The frighteningly efficient Tea Jolian economy, worth a remarkable 1,086 trillion kronor a year, is led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Book Publishing, and Retail. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 183,024 kronor, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.4 times as much as the poorest.

Conspiracy theorists allege Galapagos's new subway map resembles Satanic symbols, the election for DJ Moyer's office's janitor is heating up, nine out of ten citizens of Tea Jol answered 'nuclear safety inspector' when asked their occupation, and immersive video game experiences are interrupted by incessant disclaimer pop-ups. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Tea Jol's national animal is the Boa constrictor, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Tea Jol is ranked 302,512^th in the world and 4,853^rd in The East Pacific for Largest Insurance Industry, scoring -11.05 on the Risk Expulsion Effectiveness Rating.