The United Socialist States of Bloni is a colossal, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Prosci Lumi with an iron fist, and renowned for its national health service, ubiquitous missile silos, and rampant corporate plagiarism. The compassionate, cynical population of 2.935 billion Blonians are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The enormous, corrupt, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Hamache. The average income tax rate is 93.6%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The powerhouse Blonian economy, worth 363 trillion Balonis a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector is dominated by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Tourism, and Cheese Exports. Average income is an impressive 123,790 Balonis, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

A degree of self-hatred is vital for a future in politics, twice-daily toilet inspection rotas for government buildings are archived for public appraisal, the government is plagued with uncertainty, and fashion magazine covers finally display realistic body images following photo-manipulation becoming illegal. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Bloni's national animal is the Turtle, which frolics freely in the nation's sparkling oceans.

Bloni is ranked 11,307^th in the world and 38^th in Starlight for Most Extensive Public Healthcare, scoring 6,549.93 on the Theresa-Nightingale Rating.