The People's Republic of Orpheia is a massive, socially progressive nation, ruled by President Irene Ward with an iron fist, and notable for its anti-smoking policies, frequent executions, and rampant corporate plagiarism. The compassionate, cynical population of 1.968 billion Orpheians are ruled with an iron fist by the socialist government, which grants its people the freedom to do whatever they like so long as it doesn't involve getting richer than anybody else or challenging the government.

The enormous, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Io. The average income tax rate is 95.6%.

The frighteningly efficient Orpheian economy, worth 310 trillion picaroes a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is fairly diversified, is led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Tourism, Beef-Based Agriculture, and Arms Manufacturing. Average income is an impressive 157,936 picaroes, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The government recently donated a surfboard to an impoverished family in a landlocked region, politicians can be seen taking candy from babies, the poor are often seen pale and dizzy after selling their blood to make ends meet, and politicians preface their speeches with a declaration that any resemblance to speeches given by individuals living or dead is purely coincidental. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Orpheia's national animal is the Orpheian crow, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Orpheia is ranked 5,688^th in the world and 109^th in The Leftist Assembly for Safest, scoring 126.83 on the Bubble-Rapp Safety Rating.