The Relentless Storms of Mala Gule is a colossal, orderly nation, ruled by Tainted Lastbourne Mala Gule with an iron fist, and notable for its compulsory military service, ban on automobiles, and punitive income tax rates. The hard-nosed, cynical, devout population of 2.724 billion Malāvuzkï are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The enormous, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, with Spirituality, Law & Order, and Industry also on the agenda, while Welfare receives no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of The Storm Trbvū. The average income tax rate is 79.5%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The very strong Malāvuzkü economy, worth 227 trillion Juzüs a year, is quite specialized and mostly made up of the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Beef-Based Agriculture, Tourism, and Uranium Mining. Black market activity is rampant. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 83,375 Juzüs, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The regional delicacy of chocolate bombes is deadlier than an unexploded bomb, denied drugs and entertainment the nation's youth are taking to petty crime to alleviate their boredom, women who display their ankles are shunned by society, and mourners at funerals are ticketed for trespassing. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Mala Gule's national animal is the Ula, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Visage of Mala Wohira.

Mala Gule is ranked 300,531^st in the world and 538^th in Starlight for Nicest Citizens, with 1.04 average smiles per day.