Protect thy ears Imperator Joe Average XIII
Most Advanced Defense Forces: 824thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 1,765thMost Secular: 1,838th
The Free Democratic State of
Iron Fist Consumerists
Civil Rights
Unheard Of
Political Freedom

Overview Factbook Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

Ear Exploder 9000

Population1.805 billion

LeaderImperator Joe Average XIII

AnimalJoeaveragian Pike

The Free Democratic State of Ear Exploder 9000 is a massive, orderly nation, ruled by Imperator Joe Average XIII with an iron fist, and renowned for its strictly enforced bedtime, vat-grown people, and soft-spoken computers. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 1.805 billion Earexplodians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government is dominated by the Department of Defense, with Industry, Administration, and Healthcare also on the agenda, while Spirituality and Environment aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Cacophonia. The average income tax rate is 75.3%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Earexplodian economy, worth 311 trillion Decibels a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched black market in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, Uranium Mining, and Woodchip Exports. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 172,739 Decibels, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.2 times as much as the poorest.

Birds and children's kites are regularly brought down by anti-aircraft fire, organisations with 800 in their phone number are often raided by special forces, terrified tympanists are finding themselves on the front lines armed only with kettledrums, and military minds worry that 'the blue screen of death' on brand new operating systems may be a literal description. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Ear Exploder 9000's national animal is the Joeaveragian Pike, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Joeism.

Ear Exploder 9000 is ranked 63,105th in the world and 693rd in 10000 Islands for Healthiest Citizens, with 4.48 bananas ingested per day.

Most Advanced Defense Forces: 824thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 1,765thMost Secular: 1,838thMost Patriotic: 1,887thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 2,332ndTop
Most World Assembly Endorsements: 3,585thMost Influential: 3,838thMost Avoided: 4,370thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 6,180thMost Corrupt Governments: 6,189thLargest Mining Sector: 6,461stLargest Black Market: 6,727thMost Subsidized Industry: 7,231stMost Valuable International Artwork: 8,237thHighest Poor Incomes: 9,124thHighest Average Incomes: 10,794thTop
Most Extensive Public Healthcare: 14,463rdMost Armed: 14,495thMost Efficient Economies: 14,641stLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 15,804thMost Conservative: 18,093rdMost Authoritarian: 18,176thMost Developed: 18,466thMost Scientifically Advanced: 19,017thLargest Governments: 19,021stHighest Average Tax Rates: 20,861stLongest Average Lifespans: 22,586th
Most Advanced Defense Forces: 5th in the regionTop
Largest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 18th in the regionMost Patriotic: 18th in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 31st in the regionMost Secular: 44th in the regionMost Avoided: 56th in the regionLargest Black Market: 58th in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 64th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 69th in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 70th in the regionTop
Most Subsidized Industry: 89th in the regionMost Conservative: 89th in the regionMost Authoritarian: 92nd in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 102nd in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 125th in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 144th in the regionMost Armed: 147th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity: