The United Republics of New Scratchiland is a mammoth, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Bob Politician with a fair hand, and notable for its smutty television, aversion to nipples, and compulsory gun ownership. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful, devout population of 5.267 billion Scratchers love a good election, and the government gives them plenty of them. Universities tend to be full of students debating the merits of various civil and political rights, while businesses are tightly regulated and the wealthy viewed with suspicion.

The large, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Education, and Welfare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Scratch City. The average income tax rate is 91.4%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Scratchiland economy, worth 889 trillion Followers a year, is quite specialized and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Book Publishing, and Beef-Based Agriculture. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 168,854 Followers, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Residents of new housing subdivisions complain about the total absence of supermarkets and restaurants, hostage-takers offer loyalty scheme points for prompt payment, religious education is a new government priority, and only vaccinated citizens may have free healthcare. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. New Scratchiland's national animal is the chicken sandwich, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is turbowarp.

New Scratchiland is ranked 330,067^th in the world and 650^th in The UMNS for Largest Insurance Industry, scoring -20.65 on the Risk Expulsion Effectiveness Rating.