The Emergency Authority of Hanoch is a colossal, genial nation, ruled by Provisional Council of Hanoch with an even hand, and notable for its aversion to nipples, irreverence towards religion, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, democratic population of 3.168 billion Hanochet are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The large, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Education, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Kaldaban. The average income tax rate is 90.4%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Hanochiid economy, worth 552 trillion Senejs a year, is led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Arms Manufacturing, and Beef-Based Agriculture. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 174,492 Senejs, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The new Liquor Legitimacy Office is besieged with job applications from people who have experience in "statistical sampling methods", escaped birthday balloons are torpedoed out of the sky, this summer's chart-toppers sound almost the same as last year's, and the death penalty has been reintroduced. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Hanoch's national animal is the Sparrow, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies.

Hanoch is ranked 299,959^th in the world and 229^th in Eladria for Largest Pizza Delivery Sector, scoring -10.79 on the Pepperoni Propulsion Productivity Index.