The Socialist Republic of Cuillin is a gargantuan, socially progressive nation, ruled by Madame Self with an even hand, and renowned for its museums and concert halls, compulsory military service, and absence of drug laws. The compassionate, hard-working, cheerful population of 28.771 billion Cuillinish have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and look forward to their next free and open election, to be held on an as-yet unannounced date.

The large, corrupt government prioritizes Education, with Industry, Environment, and Social Policy also on the agenda, while Spirituality isn't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Red Clydeside. The average income tax rate is 95.3%.

The frighteningly efficient Cuillinish economy, worth a remarkable 5,138 trillion work credits a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is quite specialized, is led by the Book Publishing industry, with significant contributions from Tourism, Information Technology, and Retail. Average income is an impressive 178,595 work credits, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.5 times as much as the poorest.

Billions of work credits are being blown on orbital weapons development, the mouth-frothing Cuillinish can be confused for a rabid Giant Panda, children who can't memorize their multiplication tables are sent to the mines, and finders keepers is the law of the land. Crime is totally unknown. Cuillin's national animal is the Giant Panda, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Marxism.

Cuillin is ranked 26,105^th in the world and 117^th in Forest for Safest, scoring 110.66 on the Bubble-Rapp Safety Rating.