The Commonwealth of Buttcrackia is a huge, cultured nation, remarkable for its state-planned economy, hatred of cheese, and restrictive gun laws. The compassionate, democratic population of 744 million Buttcrackians are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The enormous, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Welfare, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Das HappyFunLand. The average income tax rate is 83.1%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The very strong Buttcrackian economy, worth 60.3 trillion thongs a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is highly specialized, is led by the Trout Farming industry, with major contributions from Information Technology and Tourism. Average income is 81,047 thongs, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Officials pull all-nighters to check immigrants for potential links to terrorists, obstetricians are not allowed to publish ultrasound pictures of fetuses in medical journals, fashion magazine covers finally display realistic body images following photo-manipulation becoming illegal, and dissing one's former country is a prerequisite to apply for Buttcrackian citizenship. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Buttcrackia's national animal is the Wolf Spider, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Buttcrackia is ranked 27,484^th in the world and 14^th in Edoca for Smartest Citizens, with 58.86 quips per hour.