The People's Republic of Samaltak True is a colossal, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by La Première with a fair hand, and renowned for its ban on automobiles, irreverence towards religion, and punitive income tax rates. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 8.29 billion Samaltakeans are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The enormous, liberal government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Environment. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Baie-Mahault. The average income tax rate is 97.1%.

The frighteningly efficient Samaltakean economy, worth a remarkable 1,218 trillion Simoleons a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is highly specialized, is led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism and Book Publishing. Average income is an impressive 146,952 Simoleons, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

It is now illegal for teens to view any sites except Club Kitten and My Little Donkey, tradesmen will knock 10% off their fees if customers pay cash, schoolboys who turn to watch pretty girls go by are given detention, and government officials sit helplessly as they are labelled 'Pompous Womples' by celebrities. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Samaltak True's national animal is the Macaw, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies.

Samaltak True is ranked 283,233^rd in the world and 4,894^th in The East Pacific for Most Patriotic, with 0.44 flags saluted per person per day.