The Tons of fun of Past beans is a titanic, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Olion with an iron fist, and renowned for its prohibition of alcohol, frequent executions, and ubiquitous missile silos. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 10.225 billion Past beansians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The medium-sized, corrupt, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Education, Defense, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Ladorph. The average income tax rate is 72.3%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Beanie economy, worth a remarkable 1,784 trillion Standard monetary units a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized, fairly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Beef-Based Agriculture, Tourism, and Information Technology. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 174,512 Standard monetary units, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Students are taught to count with all 9 fingers, soldiers are authorised to use lethal force to maintain calm in the crash zone, national stress about the waning heir-line is causing a rise in alopecia, and nobody ever questions the unquestioned rule that questions must always be asked. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Past beans's national animal is the Cat, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Egg beans.

Past beans is ranked 311,099^th in the world and 4,178^th in The North Pacific for Highest Unexpected Death Rate, scoring 22.09 on the Bus Surprisal Index.