The Billy Joel Republics of Gloucester Clty is a massive, efficient nation, ruled by Piano Man with an iron fist, and notable for its parental licensing program, zero percent divorce rate, and punitive income tax rates. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 1.296 billion Rizzlers are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The enormous, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Law & Order, and Public Transport. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Chite City. The average income tax rate is 58.3%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The very strong Gloucester Cltyian economy, worth 79.4 trillion Bombs a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized black market in Pizza Delivery, Gambling, Door-to-door Insurance Sales, and Retail. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is 61,229 Bombs, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.0 times as much as the poorest.

Press conferences always end with standing ovations and rapturous applause, people typically base their votes on which party has the cutest logo, homophobia is off the menu, and illegal immigration remains a hot topic. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Gloucester Clty's national animal is the Tsar Bomba, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Gloucester Clty is ranked 100,852^nd in the world and 58^th in The Leftist Assembly for Most Primitive, scoring -15.92 on the Scary Big Number Scale.