The Matriarchy of Eloldar is a very large, efficient nation, remarkable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, compulsory military service, and irreverence towards religion. The hard-working, democratic population of 269 million Eloldarians are effectively ruled by a group of massive corporations, who run for political office and provide their well-off citizens with world-class goods and services. Their poorer citizens, however, are mostly starving to death while being urged to go out and get real jobs. The populace has reasonably extensive civil rights, although these are mostly aimed at allowing them to buy whatever they like.

The relatively small government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Administration, and Education. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 11.0%.

The very strong Eloldarian economy, worth 18.7 trillion bitcoins a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Woodchip Exports industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Basket Weaving, and Gambling. Average income is 69,479 bitcoins, with the richest citizens earning 8.2 times as much as the poorest.

The country's famous rainforests are being bulldozed by the mining industry, organ donation rates are among the lowest in the region, TV shows must meet strict ethnicity quotas, and one-man canoes fitted with the latest tracking technology leave no room for one man. Crime, especially youth-related, is relatively low. Eloldar's national animal is the emu, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Eloldar is ranked 114,709^th in the world and 338^th in Horizon for Highest Drug Use, scoring 147.29 on the Pineapple Fondness Rating.