The Sultanate of Elm Helm is a colossal, efficient nation, remarkable for its daily referendums, frequent executions, and free-roaming dinosaurs. The hard-nosed, hard-working, humorless, devout population of 3.522 billion Elm Helmians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The medium-sized, corrupt government is primarily concerned with Defense, although Law & Order, Education, and Industry are also considered important, while International Aid and Environment aren't funded at all. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 49.4%.

The powerhouse Elm Helmian economy, worth 272 trillion Golds a year, is led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Uranium Mining, Pizza Delivery, and Gambling. Black market activity is rampant. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is 77,215 Golds, but there is a large disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 381,701 per year while the poor average 8,878, a ratio of 43.0 to 1.

Forecasts predict rains of loose lead and mortar shells for the next six weeks, the nation is renowned abroad for its love of blood and guts, the deaf are perplexed when the weather report tells them that the wind will be "bringing some rain along the Nazi ghosts", and only women may wear the crown of Elm Helm. Crime, especially youth-related, is well under control, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Elm Helm's national animal is the Akita, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Elm Helm is ranked 305,140^th in the world and 5,367^th in eta for Smartest Citizens, with 1.21 quips per hour.