The Haus of Acceel is a massive, safe nation, ruled by Lady Gaga with a fair hand, and remarkable for its ban on automobiles, vat-grown people, and stringent health and safety legislation. The compassionate, democratic population of 4.162 billion Acceelese people are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The government — a sprawling, bureaucracy-choked, socially-minded morass — juggles the competing demands of Education, Environment, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Floral Harbour. The average income tax rate is 90.3%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The Acceelese economy, worth 261 trillion Nones a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is highly specialized, is led by the Book Publishing industry, with major contributions from Trout Farming and Information Technology. Average income is 62,938 Nones, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Lady Gaga is considering changing the Acceelese flag to one with more glitter, school lessons are constantly interrupted by 'teacher needs a break' time, Lady Gaga is frequently seen begging critics to stop insulting the government, and politicians who misplace decimal points on expense reports are fired for gross incompetence. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Acceel's national animal is the Tiger, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Up to interpretation.

Acceel is ranked 30,387^th in the world and 2,093^rd in Lazarus for Lowest Crime Rates, with 82.49 law-abiding acts per hour.