The Islamic Republic of Zimardini is a titanic, orderly nation, ruled by Serafeim Stamatis with an iron fist, and notable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, compulsory military service, and complete absence of social welfare. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 17.228 billion Zimardinians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Spirituality. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Orestiada. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 72.1%.

The all-consuming Zimardinian economy, worth a remarkable 2,369 trillion Dollars a year, is quite specialized and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Arms Manufacturing, Door-to-door Insurance Sales, Uranium Mining, and Furniture Restoration. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 137,528 Dollars, but there is a large disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 518,832 per year while the poor average 25,392, a ratio of 20.4 to 1.

Using "inspect element" is grounds for espionage charges, the country is preparing for war, religious officials are furious after discovering that things made of stone do not burn well at the stake, and fathers are free to sell their daughters to whomever they choose. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Zimardini's national animal is the Giraffe, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Islam.

Zimardini is ranked 326,351^st in the world and 8^th in Equiterra for Highest Drug Use, scoring 2.08 on the Pineapple Fondness Rating.