The Chaotic Nightmare Nation of Zandos is a massive, genial nation, ruled by High Memer Eggward The Third with a fair hand, and renowned for its soft-spoken computers, national health service, and compulsory gun ownership. The compassionate, hard-working, democratic population of 2.121 billion Zandosians hold their civil and political rights very dear, although the wealthy and those in business tend to be viewed with suspicion.

The relatively small, corrupt, liberal, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Administration, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Zandia. The average income tax rate is 54.3%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Zandian economy, worth 447 trillion Zandollas a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, broadly diversified black market in Information Technology, Soda Sales, Retail, and Arms Manufacturing. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 211,106 Zandollas, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.5 times as much as the poorest.

UFO sightings are listed daily in the morning news, amusement park rides frequently collapse due to lack of maintenance, octogenarian swimsuit models insist that they've still got it, and voting for pro-Bigtopian candidates is voluntary. Crime, especially youth-related, is all-pervasive, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Zandos's national animal is the D U C C, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Hinduccism.

Zandos is ranked 85,562^nd in the world and 1,498^th in The North Pacific for Most Patriotic, with 19.01 flags saluted per person per day.