The Federal Republic of Timbabwe is a very large, efficient nation, renowned for its barren, inhospitable landscape, irreverence towards religion, and spontaneously combusting cars. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic population of 259 million Timbabweans are effectively ruled by a group of massive corporations, who run for political office and provide their well-off citizens with world-class goods and services. Their poorer citizens, however, are mostly starving to death while being urged to go out and get real jobs. The populace has reasonably extensive civil rights, although these are mostly aimed at allowing them to buy whatever they like.

The tiny, pro-business, outspoken government prioritizes Education, with Defense, Law & Order, and Industry also on the agenda, while Spirituality and International Aid are ignored. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 7.1%.

The thriving Timbabwean economy, worth 18.9 trillion pesos a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Woodchip Exports industry, with major contributions from Uranium Mining, Automobile Manufacturing, and Information Technology. Average income is 72,869 pesos, but there is a large disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 324,997 per year while the poor average 10,150, a ratio of 32.0 to 1.

Making up random numbers to name new asteroids is the bulk of astronomers' work, religious organizations are being forced to leave the country or pay income taxes like everybody else, radio shows frequently feature people denouncing religion, and the government has the power to seize property at will. Crime is a problem, with the police force struggling against a lack of funding and a high mortality rate. Timbabwe's national animal is the eagle, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to toxic air pollution.

Timbabwe is ranked 100,111^th in the world and 9^th in AP Copotopia for Highest Unexpected Death Rate, scoring 33.94 on the Bus Surprisal Index.