The Democratic Republic of Silstan is a colossal, safe nation, ruled by Samuel Carter with a fair hand, and renowned for its compulsory military service, state-planned economy, and triple-decker prams. The compassionate, democratic, devout population of 2.877 billion Silstanians are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The large, socially-minded, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Welfare, Spirituality, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of The City of Light. The average income tax rate is 49.7%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The sizeable but underdeveloped Silstanian economy, worth 83.1 trillion dollars a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is fairly diversified, is led by the Pizza Delivery industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Automobile Manufacturing, and Tourism. Average income is 28,887 dollars, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Foreign policy often involves bullwhips and leather, politicians tend to jump ship to whichever party is currently leading in the polls, the standard prescription for infertility-causing conditions is "go have a baby", and Samuel Carter has just been declared ruler of Silstan in an international press conference. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Silstan's national animal is the kiwi, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Silstan is ranked 221,758^th in the world and 1,524^th in Pacifism for Highest Unexpected Death Rate, scoring 30.06 on the Bus Surprisal Index.