The Rogue Nation of Schattenlande is a very large, orderly nation, remarkable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, avowedly heterosexual populace, and stringent health and safety legislation. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical population of 366 million Schattenlandeans are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The relatively small, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Defense, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Elyria. The average income tax rate is 18.3%.

The strong Schattenlandean economy, worth 22.4 trillion Silver Euros a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Furniture Restoration industry, with major contributions from Uranium Mining, Woodchip Exports, and Arms Manufacturing. Average income is 61,127 Silver Euros, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.7 times as much as the poorest.

Scrapyards are filled with Leader's face, when the air force says "Black Hawk Down" they mean the feathers of the Schattenlandean dark-plume goshawk, ethnic minorities are often refused admission to some of the nation's best schools, and paraplegics are told to walk it off. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Schattenlande's national animal is the Skeleton, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Schattenlande is ranked 262,695^th in the world and 64^th in womp for Smartest Citizens, with 20.35 quips per hour.