The Theocracy of Quistonix is a huge, environmentally stunning nation, renowned for its disturbing lack of elderly people, compulsory vegetarianism, and triple-decker prams. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 614 million Quistonixians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

It is difficult to tell where the omnipresent, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded, well-organized government stops and the rest of society begins, but it juggles the competing demands of Spirituality, Defense, and Law & Order. The average income tax rate is 90.9%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The Quistonixian economy, worth 37.7 trillion alms a year, is driven almost entirely by government activity, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized, extremely specialized black market in Uranium Mining and Gambling. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is 61,442 alms, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The nation's water should not be ingested while operating heavy machinery, parents ask their ten-year-olds for help with their government-mandated book reports, wrongful arrests abound as 'criminals' blame the guy next to them, and it is illegal to carry an umbrella when the official weather forecast predicts a sunny day. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Quistonix's national animal is the lion, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Quistonix is ranked 312,795^th in the world and 5,694^th in eta for Smartest Citizens, with 0.36 quips per hour.