The Republic of Qlamia is a large, cultured nation, notable for its avowedly heterosexual populace, devotion to social welfare, and stringent health and safety legislation. The cynical, devout population of 120 million Qlamians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The medium-sized, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Spirituality, Welfare, and Law & Order. The average income tax rate is 52.8%.

The sizeable but inefficient Qlamian economy, worth 6.93 trillion Ducats a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Cheese Exports, and Uranium Mining. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 57,751 Ducats, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.6 times as much as the poorest.

There are six more weeks of winter if a northerner sees his shadow, travellers are often forcibly evicted by torch-bearing mobs, ticket touts are blamed for the downfall of communism, and there's a lot of babies crying for milk in the middle of the day. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Qlamia's national animal is the porpoise, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Qlamia is ranked 301,040^th in the world and 1,187^th in the Outback for Largest Populations, with 120 million capita.