The United States of Old School Republican is a mammoth, environmentally stunning nation, notable for its compulsory military service. The hard-working population of 8.726 billion Computer89s are free to succeed or fail in life on their own merits; the successful tend to enjoy an opulent (but moralistic) lifestyle, while the failures can be seen crowding out most jails.

The tiny, moralistic government juggles the competing demands of Welfare, Defense, and Law & Order. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 7.9%.

The very strong Portlandian economy, worth 643 trillion dolars a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Trout Farming, Uranium Mining, and Furniture Restoration. Average income is 73,689 dolars, with the richest citizens earning 9.4 times as much as the poorest.

Crime, especially youth-related, is relatively low, despite the fact that it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many laws. Old School Republican's national animal is the beaver, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Old School Republican is ranked 151,240^th in the world and 5^th in atlasia for Most Cultured, scoring 64 on the Snufflebottom-Wiggendum Pentatonic Scale.