The Arling of Lakonea is a titanic, socially progressive nation, ruled by Arlessa Cyrilla vas Karanos with an even hand, and renowned for its barren, inhospitable landscape, national health service, and ubiquitous missile silos. The compassionate, hard-working, devout population of 11.893 billion Lakoneans enjoy extensive civil freedoms, particularly in social issues, while business tends to be more regulated.

The relatively small government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Spirituality, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Parnon. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 18.1%.

The very strong Lakonean economy, worth 806 trillion kamas a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Uranium Mining, Cheese Exports, and Pizza Delivery. Average income is 67,782 kamas, with the richest citizens earning 5.9 times as much as the poorest.

It's surprisingly hard to find pictures of the bad haircuts from Arlessa Cyrilla vas Karanos's childhood, there's a hole in the heart of every Lakonean city, citizens are permitted to carry concealed handguns, and citizens seem fixated on 105m x 45m rectangles. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Lakonea's national animal is the panther, which can occasionally be seen sifting through garbage in the nation's cities, and its national religion is Maumiqism.

Lakonea is ranked 130,598^th in the world and 7^th in Greece for Largest Trout Fishing Sector, scoring 2,003.7 on the Nemo Depletion Efficiency Index.