The Kingdom of Esgeirimmen is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Torgaf Müller with an even hand, and remarkable for its compulsory military service, keen interest in outer space, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate population of 14.253 billion Allers enjoy extensive civil rights and enjoy a level of social equality free from the usual accompanying government corruption.

The government — a sprawling, bureaucracy-choked, socially-minded morass — juggles the competing demands of Education, Healthcare, and Environment. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Windhelm. The average income tax rate is 98.2%.

The frighteningly efficient Allisch economy, worth a remarkable 2,001 trillion thalers a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is highly specialized, is led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Book Publishing and Tourism. Average income is an impressive 140,402 thalers, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Mountain rescue missions can end with more people lost than found, it is mandatory to learn evolution in schools, a child's only Trickster Night scare is the sight of their parents dancing, and sports fans complain that cricket tests now last an unbearable ten days. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Esgeirimmen's national animal is the dog, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Heathenism.

Esgeirimmen is ranked 288,653^rd in the world and 68^th in The Internationale for Largest Gambling Industry, scoring -21.18 on the Kelly Criterion Productivity Index.