The Republic of DatPiff is a massive, environmentally stunning nation, remarkable for its lack of airports, keen interest in outer space, and zero percent divorce rate. The democratic population of 1.126 billion DatPiffians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The medium-sized government prioritizes Defense, with Law & Order, Administration, and Healthcare also on the agenda, while International Aid is ignored. The average income tax rate is 26.4%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The DatPiffian economy, worth 52.3 trillion pesos a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Cheese Exports industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Trout Farming, and Door-to-door Insurance Sales. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 46,445 pesos, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.6 times as much as the poorest.

Artists regularly face criminal charges and art-burning parties are common, domestic fishermen fly the DatPiffian flag out of fear of being blown up, cold medicines curiously become cheaper when government officials sneeze, and patch v22.1705 - all developers are now paid for work. Crime, especially youth-related, is almost non-existent, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. DatPiff's national animal is the cow, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

DatPiff is ranked 167,904^th in the world and 13^th in DatPiff for Smartest Citizens, with 27.59 quips per hour.