The Holy United States of Comerciantes XIV is a massive, orderly nation, notable for its vat-grown people, frequent executions, and compulsory military service. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 3.655 billion Comerciantes XIVians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The medium-sized, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Industry. The average income tax rate is 34.3%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Comerciantes XIVian economy, worth 446 trillion Dinheiros a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized, broadly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, Woodchip Exports, and Beef-Based Agriculture. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 122,203 Dinheiros, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.9 times as much as the poorest.

Reporters who negatively comment on politicians' haircuts are cut from the news, Moby Dick can only be sold by pornographers, the nation's prisons are touted as the best weight loss programs money can't buy, and the bonfire of the old paper records can be seen for miles around Comerciantes XIV City. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Comerciantes XIV's national animal is the Cow, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Comerciantes XIV is ranked 50,377^th in the world and 3,014^th in Osiris for Lowest Crime Rates, with 74.07 law-abiding acts per hour.