The Republica of Clarinatia is a colossal, safe nation, ruled by Charles Auguste Mercier with a fair hand, and renowned for its rum-swilling pirates, pith helmet sales, and frequent executions. The compassionate, hard-working, democratic population of 3.11 billion Clarinatians hold their civil and political rights very dear, although the wealthy and those in business tend to be viewed with suspicion.

The relatively small, liberal, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Education, Industry, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Rigset. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 12.8%.

The frighteningly efficient Clarinatian economy, worth 568 trillion Notes a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Retail, Tourism, and Beef-Based Agriculture. Average income is an impressive 182,672 Notes, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 573,747 per year while the poor average 44,532, a ratio of 12.9 to 1.

Stylish juvenile delinquents are highly overrepresented in fatal motorcycle accidents, epileptic patients switch their medications to whichever has a 'buy one get one free' offer, the national guard is mobilized whenever a mother gets separated from her child at the mall, and new government leaflets tell coeliac children to eat more crisps. Crime is totally unknown. Clarinatia's national animal is the Crane, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Clarinatia is ranked 14,501^st in the world and 10^th in Valaryia for Highest Average Incomes, with 182,672.96 Standard Monetary Units.