The March of Carniola is a gargantuan, safe nation, ruled by Marquess Frederick V with an even hand, and remarkable for its zero percent divorce rate and suspicion of poets. The quiet, industrious population of 31.415 billion Carniolans are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The large government juggles the competing demands of Education, Welfare, and Spirituality. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Kranj. The average income tax rate is 39.2%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The large but underdeveloped Carniolan economy, worth 877 trillion thalers a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Cheese Exports industry, with major contributions from Automobile Manufacturing, Basket Weaving, and Book Publishing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 27,934 thalers, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

No-one can foil the ambitions of Big Aluminium, children raised in multi-faith households claim the other deity would let them stay up later, museums have more touchscreens on display than artifacts, and carpet bombing has decimated Brasilistan's landscape and population. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Carniola's national animal is the eagle, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies.

Carniola is ranked 102,420^th in the world and 137^th in Grant for Highest Unexpected Death Rate, scoring 33.72 on the Bus Surprisal Index.