The Holy Gold Christmas Ship of Bad Wallpaper is a massive, cultured nation, ruled by Willow Ashford with a fair hand, and renowned for its sprawling nuclear power plants, irreverence towards religion, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, democratic population of 1.35 billion Bad Wallpaperians enjoy a sensible mix of personal and economic freedoms, while the political process is open and the people's right to vote held sacrosanct.

The medium-sized, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Ashford City. The average income tax rate is 68.5%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Bad Wallpaperian economy, worth 174 trillion gold bars a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is fairly diversified, is led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Beef-Based Agriculture, and Book Publishing. Average income is an impressive 129,369 gold bars, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Politicians are often found scavenging bins at night to supplement their income, the Messiah (formerly known as Brian) is a mayoral candidate, museums offer moralization or your money back, and the government has declined to declare any particular religion as its 'official' one. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Bad Wallpaper's national animal is the monster, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Bad Wallpaper is ranked 43,319^th in the world and 6^th in The Powers that Be for Most Eco-Friendly Governments, scoring 2,160.45 on the Dolphin Recycling Awareness Index.