The Republic of Inner Ted Imazahvatia is a massive, safe nation, ruled by The Grand Director with an iron fist, and remarkable for its anti-smoking policies, pith helmet sales, and compulsory military service. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 4.752 billion Imazahvatians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Gem city. The average income tax rate is 95.5%.

The frighteningly efficient Imazahvatian economy, worth 791 trillion Gems a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector is led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Book Publishing, and Woodchip Exports. Average income is an impressive 166,606 Gems, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

People think "siege mentality" is a positive trait, barbed wire entanglements and guard towers surround the Gem city Natural History Museum, dangerous criminals are often 'accidentally' sent on one-way trips to Maxtopia, and pareidolic SETI scientists swear there's a message from aliens hidden within pi. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Inner Ted Imazahvatia's national animal is the Black Bear, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Inner Ted Imazahvatia is ranked 252,738^th in the world and 4,703^rd in the South Pacific for Most Cheerful Citizens, with 44.79 Percentage Of Water Glasses Perceived Half-Full.