The Phantasm of Afi-Aftos is a behemoth, efficient nation, ruled by Whoop Dee Whoop with an iron fist, and remarkable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, complete lack of prisons, and aversion to nipples. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 51.541 billion Afi-Aftosians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The enormous, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Administration, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Loompaland. The average income tax rate is 96.3%.

The frighteningly efficient Afi-Aftosian economy, worth an astonishing 13,981 trillion Fishterous Correlations a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, highly specialized black market in Uranium Mining, Retail, Furniture Restoration, and Basket Weaving. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 271,264 Fishterous Correlations, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.3 times as much as the poorest.

Having skeletons in one's closet is no longer just a macabre idiom, the amount welfare recipients spend on fertilizer has exploded, orange trees find it's not easy being green, and all guns must be registered. Crime is so common that it is unusual to encounter someone following the law, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Afi-Aftos's national animal is the Vermicious Knid, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Dudeism.

Afi-Aftos is ranked 4,912^th in the world and 1^st in Fredonia for Most Eco-Friendly Governments, scoring 8,343.17 on the Dolphin Recycling Awareness Index.