The Matriarchy of Spooky Candle is a colossal, efficient nation, ruled by Valerie Solanas with an even hand, and remarkable for its smutty television, absence of drug laws, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, cheerful population of 6.649 billion Candles are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The enormous, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Education, Environment, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Sankara. The average income tax rate is 95.7%.

The frighteningly efficient Candlean economy, worth 813 trillion labour vouchers a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is highly specialized, is mostly made up of the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Tourism. Average income is an impressive 122,404 labour vouchers, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Refugees from other nations are flocking to Spooky Candle's border, religious citizens are closely monitored for signs of self-harm, hospitals in Spooky Candle are too busy serving the needs of The Communist Bloc to see Candles, and trains and passengers alike are often late. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Spooky Candle's national animal is the bat, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Contemplating the Void.

Spooky Candle is ranked 280,017^th in the world and 1,121^st in The Communist Bloc for Largest Automobile Manufacturing Sector, scoring -11.49 on the Henry Ford Productivity Index.