The Republic of Statimpia is a colossal, efficient nation, ruled by Jim Slugman with a fair hand, and renowned for its keen interest in outer space, state-planned economy, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, democratic population of 4.571 billion Statimpians are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The enormous, liberal, socially-minded, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Environment. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Collimanis. The average income tax rate is 86.0%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The all-consuming Statimpian economy, worth 481 trillion Chocolate coins a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is quite specialized, is led by the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Trout Farming, and Book Publishing. Average income is an impressive 105,390 Chocolate coins, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Workers seize the means of production as foreign troops seize Statimpia's autonomy, the government has adopted a "Lightning Never Strikes Twice" approach to dealing with natural disasters, people can't decide between preserving forests and buying print copies of 'Dogman Versus The Giggler', and proper policy proposals prerequire professional peer-reviewed papers. Crime is totally unknown. Statimpia's national animal is the Pangolin, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Statimpia is ranked 289,111^th in the world and 16^th in The federation of Washington for Largest Insurance Industry, scoring -8.22 on the Risk Expulsion Effectiveness Rating.