The Please Contact Canton Empire of Saint Osmund is a titanic, socially progressive nation, ruled by Loshiywana with an even hand, and remarkable for its burgeoning Eagle population. The quiet, industrious population of 12.552 billion Saint Osmundians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The medium-sized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Education, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Merriweather. The average income tax rate is 19.9%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The Saint Osmundian economy, worth 521 trillion Pounds a year, is led by the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Furniture Restoration, Cheese Exports, and Information Technology. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is 41,526 Pounds, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.8 times as much as the poorest.

Loshiywana has just been declared ruler of Saint Osmund in an international press conference, a major religion has been named as Saint Osmund's national religion, the government is notorious for leaving citizens with almost nothing from their inheritance, and stone wrist watches that weigh 20lb are the latest trend. Crime is relatively low, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Saint Osmund's national animal is the Eagle.

Saint Osmund is ranked 133,062^nd in the world and 333^rd in Saint Osmund for Most Cultured, scoring 64 on the Snufflebottom-Wiggendum Pentatonic Scale.