The Valley Isle of Mowey is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by The Big Cheeze with an iron fist, and remarkable for its free-roaming dinosaurs, absence of drug laws, and suspicion of poets. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 25.58 billion Moweses are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The enormous, corrupt government prioritizes Administration, although Industry, Law & Order, and Healthcare are also considered important, while Defense receives no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Kahuaina. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 82.4%.

The frighteningly efficient Moweyian economy, worth a remarkable 3,886 trillion pollens a year, is highly specialized and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Retail, Uranium Mining, Furniture Restoration, and Book Publishing. Average income is an impressive 151,946 pollens, with the richest citizens earning 7.6 times as much as the poorest.

Universities spend millions cultivating ivy on their buildings, down payment blues in foreign nations are a thing of the past, breast milk is being redistributed from each according to their ability to each according to their need, and it is cheaper to die in the wilderness than to survive. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Mowey's national animal is the GMO corn, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Violetism.

Mowey is ranked 325,781^st in the world and 7^th in Oahu for Nicest Citizens, with 0.28 average smiles per day.