The Colony of Koorns is a titanic, safe nation, remarkable for its compulsory military service and restrictive gun laws. The hard-working, cynical, devout population of 17.758 billion Koornsians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Spirituality, Welfare, and Law & Order. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 37.3%.

The strong Koornsian economy, worth a remarkable 1,021 trillion Citas a year, is dominated by the Trout Farming industry, with significant contributions from Pizza Delivery, Furniture Restoration, and Basket Weaving. Average income is 57,498 Citas, with the richest citizens earning 5.6 times as much as the poorest.

Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Koorns's national animal is the Vippertooth Dragon.

Koorns is ranked 188,336^th in the world and 1^st in Nova Jane Austinus for Largest Black Market, with 591 billion Standard Monetary Units.