The Steppe Nomads of Horde is a gargantuan, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Roxana Scythiana with a fair hand, and renowned for its rum-swilling pirates, multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, and ubiquitous missile silos. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic, cheerful population of 13.938 billion Hordes are effectively ruled by a group of massive corporations, who run for political office and provide their well-off citizens with world-class goods and services. Their poorer citizens, however, are mostly starving to death while being urged to go out and get real jobs. The populace has reasonably extensive civil rights, although these are mostly aimed at allowing them to buy whatever they like.

The medium-sized, corrupt, pro-business, outspoken government prioritizes Defense, with Education, Industry, and Administration also on the agenda, while Welfare and Spirituality are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Samarqand. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient Horde economy, worth a remarkable 9,184 trillion arrows a year, is fairly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, Book Publishing, and Tourism. Average income is a breathtaking 658,952 arrows, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 5,997,004 per year while the poor average 8,206, a ratio of 730 to 1.

The nation has declared its intention to "stretch out", photographers can be found hiding behind the curtains in Roxana Scythiana's bedroom, the official Horde Phrase Book weighs as much as a small child, and when shaking hands with foreign leaders Roxana Scythiana wears an armoured gauntlet. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Horde's national animal is the Wild Horse, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Shamanic Tengrism.

Horde is ranked 292,860^th in the world and 9^th in The Horde for Most Primitive, scoring -1309.28 on the Scary Big Number Scale.