The City of Havath Toustuvia is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Mayor with an iron fist, and notable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, ban on automobiles, and exploding hoverboards. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 15.798 billion Havath Toustuvians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The enormous, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Law & Order, and Defense. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Boston. The average income tax rate is 95.6%.

The frighteningly efficient Havath Toustuvian economy, worth a remarkable 3,681 trillion dollars a year, is quite specialized and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Retail, Arms Manufacturing, Furniture Restoration, and Uranium Mining. Average income is an amazing 233,007 dollars, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 676,765 per year while the poor average 63,500, a ratio of 10.7 to 1.

The new intercity submarine SSN Falcon Warrior instills terror in claustrophobic travellers, the overhead luggage compartment is often full, foreign converts are illuminated by both missionaries and helicopter searchlights, and scientists regularly clone human beings for research purposes. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Havath Toustuvia's national animal is the falcon, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to toxic air pollution, and its national religion is Red Sox.

Havath Toustuvia is ranked 1,292^nd in the world and 2^nd in Boston for Most Primitive, scoring 226.2 on the Scary Big Number Scale.