The Popsicle Pete Nation of Clench is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Joseph with an iron fist, and remarkable for its digital currency, suspicion of poets, and complete absence of social welfare. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 44.795 billion follower of Josephs are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The relatively small, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, although Industry and Healthcare are also considered important, while Social Policy and Environment are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Joseph City. The average income tax rate is 98.4%.

The frighteningly efficient Josephic economy, worth an astonishing 46,771 trillion monies a year, is broadly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, Woodchip Exports, and Door-to-door Insurance Sales. Average income is a breathtaking 1,044,117 monies, but there is a large disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 4,698,528 per year while the poor average 143,140, a ratio of 32.8 to 1.

Molehills are the only mountains deemed safe enough for the public, children are often observed making 'sand angels' in bunkers, escaped birthday balloons are torpedoed out of the sky, and the population's jaw muscles put sharks to shame. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, despite the fact that it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many laws. Clench's national animal is the viper, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Josephism.

Clench is ranked 332,047^th in the world and 2,438^th in the Rejected Realms for Highest Drug Use, scoring 0.37 on the Pineapple Fondness Rating.