The Federal Republic of Canineia is a titanic, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Chieftain Ben Growler with an iron fist, and remarkable for its irreverence towards religion, suspicion of poets, and complete absence of social welfare. The hard-nosed, cynical population of 13.401 billion Canineians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The enormous government prioritizes Healthcare, although Education, Law & Order, and Defense are also considered important, while Spirituality and International Aid receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Canidae Harbour. The average income tax rate is 69.0%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The very strong Canineian economy, worth 693 trillion Canineian Credits a year, is quite specialized and mostly made up of the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Furniture Restoration and Arms Manufacturing. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is 51,723 Canineian Credits, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Prisons are filled with the cackles and sobs of a deranged inmate population, workers have their fruitcake and eat it too, Owl sanctuaries have been taken over by hydraulic fracturing sites, and political talk shows often have children as guests whenever they need commentary on world religions. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Canineia's national animal is the Owl, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Satanism.

Canineia is ranked 39,790^th in the world and 14^th in Saint Helene for Largest Populations, with 13.4 billion capita.