The United Nations of Opiachus is a colossal, cultured nation, ruled by Secretary-General Lee with an even hand, and renowned for its ubiquitous missile silos, complete lack of prisons, and hatred of cheese. The hard-nosed, hard-working population of 8.687 billion Opians enjoy some of the most opulent lifestyles in the region, unless they are unemployed or working-class, in which case they are variously starving to death or crippled by easily preventable diseases.

The medium-sized, liberal, pro-business government prioritizes Education, with Defense, Industry, and Social Policy also on the agenda, while Spirituality and Welfare aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Opiachus. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 35.3%.

The frighteningly efficient Opian economy, worth a remarkable 1,114 trillion dollars a year, is led by the Book Publishing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Arms Manufacturing, and Retail. Black market activity is notable. Average income is an impressive 128,268 dollars, but there is an enormous disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 704,527 per year while the poor average 11,869, a ratio of 59.4 to 1.

RPG fans reminisce fondly about when people thought they were evil and dangerous rather than geeky and socially inept, Opians suffer not the eggplant emoji to live, there's a bright dawn ahead for Opiachus, and the people have taken "Hail Secretary-General Lee" as an invitation to lob rocks. Crime, especially youth-related, is a major problem, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Opiachus's national animal is the dove, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Opiachus is ranked 171,301^st in the world and 20^th in Free Market Federation for Largest Gambling Industry, scoring 125.05 on the Kelly Criterion Productivity Index.