The Martial Republic of Ascoobis is a gargantuan, safe nation, ruled by Generalissimo Reyno Nicholas with an even hand, and renowned for its vat-grown people, state-planned economy, and soft-spoken computers. The compassionate, humorless population of 24.171 billion Ascoobians are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The enormous, corrupt, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Education, Defense, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Darkmount. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient Ascoobian economy, worth a remarkable 5,907 trillion Credits a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is highly specialized, is mostly made up of the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Arms Manufacturing and Tourism. Average income is an amazing 244,406 Credits, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The government is a clear-cut case of tyranny by majority, children must be board certified to append "Jr" to their name, government statisticians explain census inaccuracies by declaring that "Sith happens", and the government's new "quiet competence" initiative has supporters and detractors alike reeling in confusion. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Ascoobis's national animal is the Golden Eagle, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Secularism.

Ascoobis is ranked 282,993^rd in the world and 131^st in Equiterra for Nicest Citizens, with 0.32 average smiles per day.