The Holy Empire of Arumba is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by Emperor Johnny with an iron fist, and renowned for its anti-smoking policies, national health service, and state-planned economy. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 27.375 billion Arumbas are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The medium-sized, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Polk City. The average income tax rate is 98.2%.

The frighteningly efficient Arumban economy, worth an astonishing 12,678 trillion Arumban Dollars a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, broadly diversified black market in Information Technology, Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, and Basket Weaving. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 463,135 Arumban Dollars, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The "swords to plowshares" policy has created a generation of farmers that can kill a yak from 200 yards away, groups of government workers are declared protected tribes if they venture too deep into the Capitol, former slave owners are now enslaved to basic human rights laws, and former slave-owners hope there are no hard feelings when they apply for jobs from their erstwhile charges. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Arumba's national animal is the Harmles Alligator, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to heavy metals seepage into national waterways, and its national religion is Aztec.

Arumba is ranked 330,638^th in the world and 5^th in The Beach for Most Compassionate Citizens, scoring 9.04 on the Kitten Softness Rating.